Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
