Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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