when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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