Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I can't trust your balls anymore.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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