its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
