when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
