my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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