real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
he fucked my hip out of place.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Randomize