She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Did I show you my penis last night?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Randomize
