then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
