I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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