Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Randomize
