So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
