im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
