She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
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