You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
