you guys were way drunker than both of me
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Randomize
