I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
