He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
