after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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