my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
i out mim tonsoeep
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