Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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