I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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