Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Non-Jews are for practice
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
she pinky promised me she was 18
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize
