i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
