I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
