yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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