I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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