i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
