i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
