Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
