Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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