his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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