this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
