This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
