Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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