can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
