i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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