I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
