Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
is this the sara with the beer cane?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
