got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
