he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
