oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize