At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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