She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
