she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
She's not a foreskin expert like you
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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