If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
