I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
