I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
