1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
