all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
