I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
